change

Why the big deal with optimism?

Isn’t optimism just naive idealism? The pessimists even think that if you could only grasp what’s going on, you wouldn’t be so optimistic. Let’s take a look.

The test-tube represents reality. However, optimism has benefit and pessimism has no useful benefit. In the end, optimism is a simple choice to interpret at the higher end of the spectrum.

Without optimism, or looking for what’s possible, there is no innovation and creativity. Optimism is the basis of hope and survival. Optimism surpasses other known predictors as a measure of sales performance. Those most pessimistic about the future are at greater risk of early death, while optimists live longer.  

“In the end, optimism is a choice.” 

Here are simple, everyday methods of increasing optimism, both individually and in the workplace:

  1. For both individual and groups, keep a record of events and actions that you feel positive about and write down supportive comments from others. Review successes and positive events regularly with the team.

  2. Switch to an Optimistic Mindset. Both pessimism and optimism build on reactions to small everyday events. Pessimism can be coached toward optimism by changing reactions to events: Pessimists respond to unwanted events with a permanent “it will always be this way” and complete “this terrible failure affects all of them” reaction, for example: “Why me? This happens all the time! I’m no good at anything! I never will be. It’ll never get better. The world’s a mess. People are terrible. It’s hopeless. Might as well give up.” All events are then filtered through this pessimistic screen, and hope is virtually impossible.

    To build optimism, know that change does not happen TO YOU, it happens FOR YOU. Pessimists believe the world is out to get them; optimists believe that events conspire on their behalf.

    Avoid all-or-nothing thinking; rather, think in percentages: “This happens only x% of the time, not all the time.” “This involves only x% of me, not all of me.” 

  3. Change your language. Change “we have to, we need to” into “we get to, we want to.” Small actions practiced consistently lead to big changes. Practice new automatic responses that focus on reality and action. When unwanted events happen, say: “OK, I’m handling this.” “This is here to teach me, looking for the lesson.” “I didn’t want that to happen, but now that it has, what can I do?”

  4. Each morning, create the intention to focus that day only on what’s right, what is working. Send out messages to remind others, such as these postcards (shown at bottom). At end of day, review what was positive, what worked out. Optimism results from daily practice. You can build any given skill or capacity the same way as physical muscle grows.

    The word for the highest form of love in Greek: agape, translates as “look for the good.” Looking for the good in yourself and others is a high form of consciousness.  

    Your perception of yourself and your environment is your reality. You put huge mirrors out there in the universe that reflect back to you what you’re thinking. You act on the basis of your perceptions of yourself. If you change your perceptions, you change the way you think and feel about yourself and your future. 

    Optimism spreads almost as quickly as pessimism. It takes only one determined optimist to help change the workplace atmosphere. Change in group optimism can result from the actions of one person entraining a group. One optimistic person can change a nation, indeed the world. Why not a department or a company?

    Check out more about optimism on pages 122-124 in this free chapter in The Four Elements book.

Stay positive and focused

How to Be Smarter Than a Rat

A few days ago I woke to the sound of scampering feet in the attic, sighed, did the research, and bought a dozen T-Rex baits.

The instructions were clear: Lay the traps for a few days without setting them or baiting them.

Rats are smart enough to avoid novel objects in the environment when there is no prior record in their brains (or negative experience). 

Getting Past Change Dangerfield

Here are some recent observations and musings about what it is taking to get people to change these days. These points are based on what I see is lacking in many change efforts and what has worked. 

1. Help your resistant folks understand that change keeps the brain young. It’s good for not just the company but for their own survival. The brain grows when it learns difficult things, not easy stuff. Besides, there aren’t any places they can go to work anymore that won’t expect you to have a digital brain. So get over it, essentially.

Life Becomes Real at the Point of Action

I love that quote from Plato. Reality is in doing, not wishing or wanting. Making the Decision. Starting. Persevering. When Diana Nyad was asked how she accomplished the swim from Cuba to Florida, she responded: “Just do it, find a way, never, ever quit.” Sounds easy.

Start with What – Not How

“How did she do that?” OMG, that’s amazing – how do you do all that you do?” Questions involving ‘how’ lead you into a jungle of confusion. Never ask how. Only decide what. In an ideal life plan, you’ll have created your matrices of overriding life visions (e.g. happiness and joy, creative and meaningful work, health and fitness), then broad actions that will lead to the fulfillment of those visions, then specific actions that can be accomplished now. Always start with the vision, then work back to broad action. When an action shows up that is part of the vision, make a decision to do it. It wouldn’t have shown up if it weren’t meant for you. Make the decision to do it, despite all reasonable evidence that it wouldn’t be possible for you (the hows don’t line up).

Balanced or Burning Out?

Burnout is a gradual loss of energy that develops from wanting to succeed, caring a lot, and lacking a turn-off switch that makes you stop when you’ve done enough. You’re probably even missing the system that monitors “enough.” Here’s a link to a quick assessment to find your Zone: Safe, Caution, or Danger.

Burnout creeps up, stealing energy as it gobbles up your life. The best way to deal with it is to prevent it.

In this article are the seven usual steps. They’re not symptoms–just a description of the progression of the disease. The steps reflect the assessment.

Five Things You Should Never Do

Change demands energy! Here are five energy wasters that seem subtle, soft, and innocuous. But they are choices that absorb a lot of energy. If you make changes in any of these areas, you’ll have a lot more energy to spend on making worthwhile changes.

1. Don’t do anything for anyone over the age of 18 that they can and should be doing for themselves. This behavior weakens the recipient and usually causes resentment in the caregiver. Resentment is powerfully disabling and leads to other bad habits you don’t need. If you are rescuing anyone over 18, you are not helping them. Rather, you are meeting your own unmet needs and it is time to meet those from other sources.

Better to “Want” Than to “Get”

Next time you announce a new incentive program, or the possibility of an award, start measuring productivity, well-being and satisfaction month by month until the actual award period, and for a couple of months afterward. 

The ANTICIPATION of a reward feels better than receiving the actual award and is more motivating. It is a quirk in the structure of the brain’s reward system.

How to Procrastinate Well

If you’re going to do something, do it 100%. If you are going to procrastinate, do it 100% so it becomes a pure activity.

If you a) avoid an unwanted task by procrastinating and b) do something rather pleasant and mildly fulfilling during that time (tidy up, make labels, make another cup of tea) you are double-dipping into the Rewards Jar with both positive and negative reinforcement at play.

Procrastination. If procrastination is causing you problems, it might be because you make it so rewarding. Whatever you find rewarding will be repeated. Here’s an escape route for you.